Prejudice versus kindness, evidence that God does help us, and not shirking our duties. More lessons from David and the sons of Zeruiah. Part 4.
Today we continue our study of the relationship between Biblical King David and his warrior nephews, who David once said, 'be too hard for me' (2 Samuel 3:39).
So far we have seen how David's nephews tempted him to take matters into his own hands, insulted and ignored David's judgement, and perhaps indirectly influenced David to add to a catalogue of sin.
We now have two occasions when the middle nephew, Joab, who was the chief commander of David's army has communication with David which causes David to take action:
- The conquest of Rabbah
- The wise woman's story
1. The conquest of Rabbah
The first occasion follows on from the disappointing events of last month, when David has stayed back at Jerusalem during the season of fighting battles and fallen into a cascade of sins.
Joab and the army have been besieging the royal city of the Ammonites, Rabbah. Victory is now in their sights and Joab sends a message to David to gather the people and join them in taking the city, 'lest I (Joab) take the city, and it be called after my name' (2 Samuel 12:28).
David obeys Joab's message, gathers the people and joins the victorious battle resulting in the conquered king's crown being placed on his own head.
It is this very obedience of David to Joab and the message that Joab sent that makes me wonder if this is another example of Joab's strong character - that character which is too hard for David to stand up to - which is speaking to David with such familiarity and urging him to join them because of the consequences if he didn't.
But was David continuing in his somewhat neglectful behaviour by lingering at Jerusalem at the time of warfare, and Joab was stirring him up to make him come and take his rightful place?
The commentators seem to be agreed in thinking that Joab was actually being very loyal and honest towards David by ensuring the honour and glory that was rightfully his in all but conquering this city, was ascribed to David.
Some additionally suggest that David's extra help and the strengthening of the army was needed for the final push in taking over, and Matthew Henry comments on God's mercy to David in allowing him this victory at a time when David had likely not yet repented from his adultery and murder.
What lessons can we then take from this account?
- Cherry picking or self-bias for prejudice against people
Firstly, as I sat here thinking over this passage it occurred to me to take a step back and think about my own thoughts.
Have you heard the term 'cherry picking the literature?'
When I was writing a dissertation I remember the tutor advising us of the risks of 'cherry picking' - when we look for the research that supports our opinion and ignore or minimise the research which doesn't support the hypothesis we are working on. It is a personal bias towards a particular view.
I confess that here because of David's earlier words regarding his challenging nephews I was bias towards finding evidence that Joab was continuing to be too hard for David - that he was showing further disrespect, insubordination and self-will.
How important it is to guard ourselves against becoming prejudiced against people, whether because of our own experiences with them or because of what somebody has told us about them!
We may have hard people in our lives who challenge us, but do we start to harbour resentment and suspicion against them, and treat them as if they are always acting wrongly, as if we are better than them? Do we as the old English proverb says, 'give a dog a bad name and hang him'?!
Our human nature can quickly start to do this - we also say, 'once bitten, twice shy'! But what does God teach us?
As I was reminded at a recent worship service, if God has for Jesus' sake forgiven our confessed sins He does not remember them. Not because He can't, but because our sins have been cancelled out by Jesus - they no longer exist. Isn't this wonderful? And how undeserved it is! God does not hold the sins of His people against them and harbour resentment against them, and this is the example we are to follow, and yet in our own strength or by exercising our own will is so hard to do!
Paul writes to the Corinthian church that 'charity (love) suffereth long and is kind...is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil (keeps no account of evil)' (1 Corinthians 13:4,5).
True religion, true love is more than exercising our self-will to be a certain way, but the Holy Spirit living within us produces the fruit of love, which is gentle and kind. This loving spirit does not 'think evil' of another person's actions, i.e. suspect them of ulterior motives and act suspiciously towards them. This loving spirit strives to forgive over and over again as we have been forgiven.
This needs a continual coming back to the Lord Jesus in prayer and asking for His help to leave our quick resentment and suspicions with Him, asking for more of His loving forgiving Spirit, telling Him how we feel so unable to forgive, to love our enemies or those who are too hard for us, but telling Him we want to trust Him that it is all under His control and will work for our good, asking for His help to pray for that person who is too hard for us and to think loving thoughts towards them.
And how I think we also need to pray for wisdom in how to deal with that person, for wisdom in showing love and kindness and yet persevering with moving forward in those other things that the Lord has given us to do, in not being distracted from His purposes for us and feeling like giving up, for wisdom to not be foolish and gullible, but discerning.
- God does help us in our hard situations!
Another Biblical account encourages us afresh that God knows, listens and helps us as we are faced with these difficult people and situations - I am currently reading through the book of Esther again in my morning readings and today I was struck again at the amazing timing of that night when the king could not sleep and decides to reward Esther's cousin/adopted father, Mordecai, for saving his life.
This happened on the night preceding the very morning Haman (his next in command) has planned to come to the king to ask that he might hang Mordecai on the gallows he has specially built for that purpose.
Think of Mordecai's perhaps bewilderment and wonder as early that morning he continues his vigil sitting in the king's gate covered in sackcloth and ashes, mourning, sad and apprehensive, the weight of his and his people's doom heavy upon him, his heart no doubt continually crying to God to have mercy and help them in their desperate situation.
But yet, what is this, coming towards him, but the very man, Haman. Haman, who has recently persuaded the king to sign a decree to have all Mordecai's race killed, who only a short while before had probably pompously swept passed Mordecai to speak with the king, and is walking towards Mordecai leading the king's personal horse, perhaps accompanied by other servants carefully carrying the king's crown and the king's clothes.
Mordecai can probably hardly believe his ears as they tell him to put on these clothes and the king's crown, and he is helped onto the horse, Haman no doubt looking pained, sick and furious as all his plans start to back fire.
Is he really riding along on that horse through the streets of the city, Haman proclaiming to all around, his voice perhaps almost strangled as if he can hardly say the words, 'Thus shall be done unto the man whom the king delighteth to honour'? (Esther 6:11)
Mordecai must have felt as if he was in a dream and as he got off the horse and put back on his sackcloth and ashes sitting again in the king's gate where he was forbidden to be in such clothes, he must have had to shake himself and wonder if it had really just happened!
But how this account encourages us that in our hardest times, faced with these difficult people, God is still working behind the scenes. He still hears and answers our prayers, and He can work 'wondrously' in our favour! Glory be to God! May we have our eyes opened to see how God is helping us.
How it encourages us with God's grace to yield our will to Him and strive to love those who are too hard for us, strive to suppress those suspicious prejudiced thoughts against them which our old nature is so quick to supply, strive to love and forgive and honour our Lord's commands.
- Pushed to be the 'best version of ourselves'
This brings me to a second point that in this account of David and Joab, we have an example of Joab, a strong character, urging David into action for a right and proper outcome. It is like a person who we find too hard and challenging pushing us to use more of our talents, to live up to our responsibilities, or to do what is expected of our position.
Even when we are following the Lord Jesus we are still sinners. Sometimes we need a 'hard talk' from somebody to tell us we 'need to pull our socks up' or to 'pull our weight', or not to shirk our responsibilities. We may not like the person or what they are saying but perhaps it is needful.
They may be telling us - "David, come and help finish conquering this city otherwise recognition of the achievement will go to me - Joab" - somebody who was not anointed to be king, somebody who wanted the recognition to go to the rightful person to receive the honour and wear the crown of the conquered king of Ammon.
But what they are telling us may feel too hard because of our own lack of confidence, fear of failure, lack of skills or knowledge. David though was an experienced warrior who had won many battles trusting in God, and leaning on God to help him. Was he shirking his responsibilities by staying at home? We don't know what other reasons there may have been for his delay, but none are given.
When God has given us a work to do He says - as to Joshua:
'Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be not dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest' (Joshua 1:9)
We are to go forward in our paths, not shirking our responsibilities and calling, but to take courage that God is with us and will never let us down.
May we be given grace to submit to others when they can see our faults and try to motivate us to do what we are called to do - may we pray for grace to submit to the Lord's direct chastening when we are not living up to our calling, and may we be to each other as we read in Hebrews 10:24, 'let us consider one another to provoke (stir up) unto love and good works' that God may be glorified.
In summary then, Joab appears to have spoken to his Uncle David as an equal rather than a king, but perhaps David needed the call to action because he was shirking his responsibilities. Instead, Joab appears to have been demonstrating his loyalty to his king and was not taking advantage of a situation to promote himself.
However, this does teach us to beware how we can start to be prejudiced against people, especially if we 'don't like' them or have heard rumours about them, instead of noticing how they may be calling us to do our God given duty.
*****
Next month God Willing we will take a look at the next recorded interaction of Joab with David - the wise woman's story.
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